How to meditate with stillness and get alignment with the universe energy

Introduction

THE POWER OF MEDITATION: PREPARE YOUR MIND, HEAL YOUR HEART, AND CONNECT WITH INNER PEACE

By Surya Bhan

Motivational Speaker | Law of Attraction Coach | NLP Trainer | Ho'oponopono Healing Trainer | Writer

1. INTRODUCTION: IS YOUR MIND TRULY READY FOR MEDITATION?

Imagine waking up early in the morning, sitting quietly, closing your eyes, and repeating the word Om for ten or fifteen minutes. You expect to feel peaceful, confident, positive, and energetic throughout the day.

But after a few minutes, your mind is still occupied with yesterday's arguments, tomorrow's responsibilities, financial worries, jealousy, resentment, and unfinished tasks.

You may wonder, “Why am I not experiencing the peace I expected from meditation?”

The answer begins with understanding what meditation actually is.

Meditation is not simply the act of sitting with your eyes closed or repeating a particular word. It is a practice of developing awareness, training attention, and learning to observe your thoughts, emotions, and experiences without automatically reacting to them.

Chanting Om, focusing on your breathing, repeating a mantra, or silently observing your thoughts can all be meditation practices. Different approaches work differently for different people. No single technique is necessary for everyone.

However, there is an important question we should ask ourselves:

Before sitting down to meditate, have we prepared ourselves to face the thoughts and emotions that may arise within us?

Imagine trying to fill a glass with fresh water while continuously pouring muddy water into it. You may keep adding clean water, but the glass will not become clear immediately.

In a similar way, if you sit down to meditate while carrying anger, resentment, guilt, or emotional tension, you may find it difficult to settle your attention. This does not mean you must eliminate every negative emotion before meditating. It means that acknowledging your emotions and approaching yourself with compassion can make your practice more meaningful.

This chapter introduces three preparatory practices that can support your meditation journey:

1. Forgiveness: Releasing the unnecessary burden of resentment and making amends where appropriate.

2. Self-Forgiveness: Learning from past mistakes without continuing to punish yourself emotionally.

3. Gratitude and Prayer: Appreciating the people whose efforts support your life and wishing them well.

These practices can help you approach meditation with greater emotional awareness, humility, compassion, and openness.

Let us explore how to incorporate them into a practical daily routine.

2. THE PROBLEM: WHY DO WE STRUGGLE TO FIND INNER PEACE?

We live in a world filled with constant stimulation. Our phones demand attention, our responsibilities compete for time, and our minds repeatedly revisit the past or worry about the future.

Even when we sit quietly, our thoughts may continue racing.

Sometimes, we carry anger toward someone who hurt us years ago. Sometimes, we regret something we said to a loved one. Sometimes, we compare ourselves with others and feel that our own lives are not good enough.

These emotional burdens can make it harder to relax and focus.

Consider the following situations:

- You sit down to meditate but keep remembering an argument with a family member.

- You close your eyes, but your mind repeatedly returns to a person who betrayed your trust.

- You try to concentrate on your breathing, but guilt about a past mistake keeps disturbing you.

- You want to feel peaceful, yet you spend much of your time criticizing yourself.

- You pray for happiness but rarely pause to appreciate the people who make your daily life easier.

The problem is not that you are incapable of meditation.

The problem may be that you expect your mind to become quiet instantly without giving yourself time to acknowledge what you are carrying.

Meditation is not a competition. It is a practice.

You do not need a perfectly peaceful mind to begin. You need the willingness to observe your present experience with patience.

The purpose of preparation is not to become a perfect human being before meditating. It is to become more aware, compassionate, and willing to sit with yourself honestly.

3. DETAILED EXPLANATION: THE THREE FOUNDATIONS OF MEDITATION PREPARATION

STEP ONE: FORGIVENESS — RELEASE THE BURDEN OF RESENTMENT

Forgiveness is one of the most meaningful emotional practices you can explore before meditation.

When someone hurts us, we may continue replaying the incident in our minds. We imagine what we should have said, what they should have done, and how we wish the situation had ended.

Even when the other person is no longer present, the memory may continue occupying our attention.

Forgiveness offers us an opportunity to change our relationship with that experience.

It does not mean that what happened was acceptable. It does not mean that we must forget the incident, trust the person again, or allow them to hurt us repeatedly.

Forgiveness means working toward freedom from the emotional grip of resentment while protecting your dignity and boundaries.

Let us explore three practical forms of forgiveness.

A. Ask for Forgiveness From Those You Have Hurt

Every human being makes mistakes.

Sometimes, we speak harshly when we are angry. Sometimes, we ignore someone who needs our support. Sometimes, we hurt another person through our actions, carelessness, or lack of understanding.

We may justify our behavior at first, but later we realize that our words or actions caused pain.

Before meditation, take a few moments to reflect on your relationships.

Ask yourself:

- Have I hurt someone through my words?

- Have I treated someone unfairly?

- Have I ignored a responsibility toward another person?

- Is there a sincere apology I need to offer?

If a person comes to mind, acknowledge your mistake honestly.

You may write their name in a journal and reflect on what happened. If contacting them is appropriate and safe, consider offering a sincere apology.

For example:

“I have been thinking about what happened between us. I realize that my words hurt you, and I am sorry. I should have handled the situation differently. I am not asking you to forget what happened immediately, but I want to acknowledge my mistake and take responsibility for it.”

A sincere apology does not demand immediate forgiveness. It accepts responsibility and gives the other person the freedom to respond in their own time.

If contacting the person would violate their boundaries or create an unsafe situation, you can reflect privately and commit to changing your behavior.

B. Forgive Those Who Have Hurt You

Now consider the people who have caused you pain.

Perhaps someone insulted you, betrayed your trust, ignored your feelings, or treated you unfairly.

You may have carried that pain for months or even years.

Ask yourself:

“Am I still allowing this experience to occupy my mind every day?”

“What would it mean for me to begin releasing some of this resentment?”

You do not have to deny the pain or pretend that the person behaved correctly.

You can acknowledge what happened and still choose not to organize your entire emotional life around it.

Try this reflection:

“I acknowledge the pain I experienced. What happened matters, and my feelings deserve to be understood. I am willing to work toward releasing the resentment that keeps hurting me. I can forgive at my own pace while maintaining the boundaries I need.”

Remember, forgiveness is a process. You may need to return to it more than once.

You are not required to reconcile with someone who continues to harm you. Sometimes, peace includes distance.

C. Practice Self-Forgiveness

The third form of forgiveness is self-forgiveness.

This is often difficult because we remember our own mistakes more vividly than we remember the lessons we learned from them.

We may repeatedly tell ourselves:

“I should never have done that.”

“How could I make such a mistake?”

“I have ruined everything.”

“I do not deserve happiness.”

Reflection can help us recognize mistakes, but endless self-punishment does not undo them.

Self-forgiveness means acknowledging what you did, accepting responsibility, making amends where possible, learning from the experience, and allowing yourself to move forward.

Ask yourself:

- What exactly did I do wrong?

- What can I learn from this experience?

- Is there anything I can repair?

- What will I do differently next time?

Then repeat these words slowly:

“I acknowledge my mistakes. I accept responsibility for my actions. I am willing to learn, make amends where possible, and become a better person. I do not have to punish myself forever to prove that I regret what happened.”

Your past may teach you valuable lessons, but it does not have to become a permanent sentence against your future.

STEP TWO: SELF-AWARENESS AND INNER ACCEPTANCE — MAKE PEACE WITH YOURSELF

After reflecting on forgiveness, the next step is to develop a more accepting relationship with yourself.

Many people believe that meditation requires them to feel completely pure, happy, or free from negative emotions.

This expectation can create unnecessary pressure.

You may sit down to meditate and discover that you are still angry, worried, jealous, or sad.

Instead of judging yourself, learn to acknowledge what you are experiencing.

Say silently:

“I notice that I am feeling anxious.”

“I notice that I am carrying resentment.”

“I notice that I am worried about the future.”

“I can acknowledge these feelings without allowing them to control every decision I make.”

This is an important element of mindful awareness.

You are not trying to force every emotion to disappear. You are learning to observe it without automatically reacting.

Practice Emotional Awareness

Sit comfortably and ask yourself:

“What am I feeling right now?”

“Where do I notice tension in my body?”

“What thoughts keep returning to my mind?”

“Is there something I need to address after this meditation?”

Allow the answers to arise without criticizing yourself.

If a practical issue needs attention, you can write it down and return to it after your meditation session.

If an emotion remains present, allow it to be present while gently returning your attention to your breathing.

You may also repeat these affirmations:

- I can acknowledge my feelings without judging myself.

- I am learning to respond rather than react.

- I can accept my imperfections while working to improve.

- I deserve patience and compassion as I grow.

- I can learn from the past without living in it.

- I am willing to meet the present moment with awareness.

Do not worry if you cannot immediately believe every statement. Choose words that feel honest and supportive.

The objective is not to manufacture a perfect emotional state. It is to develop a healthier relationship with your inner experience.

STEP THREE: GRATITUDE AND PRAYER — RECOGNIZE THE PEOPLE WHO SUPPORT YOUR LIFE

The third foundation is gratitude.

Every day, we benefit from the efforts of many people whose names we may never know.

Think about an ordinary morning.

You wake up in a home that provides shelter. You drink water, prepare food, travel to work, communicate with others, and carry out your responsibilities.

Behind many of these ordinary activities are people whose work makes our lives easier.

Consider the following:

1. Farmers: They cultivate crops and help bring food to our tables, often working through difficult weather conditions.

2. Doctors and nurses: They care for people during illness and help protect health.

3. Soldiers and emergency personnel: They undertake demanding responsibilities to help protect communities and respond to danger.

4. Drivers and transport workers: They help people and essential goods reach their destinations.

5. Teachers: They share knowledge and help students develop their abilities.

6. Sanitation workers: They help keep communities cleaner and healthier.

7. Delivery workers: They bring essential goods and services to our homes and workplaces.

8. Shopkeepers and vegetable sellers: They help make everyday necessities accessible.

9. Family members and caregivers: They often provide emotional support, practical assistance, and care that we may take for granted.

10. Many other workers: Countless people contribute to the systems and services that support our daily lives.

When we recognize these contributions, we begin to see that our lives are connected to the efforts of others.

Gratitude can help us become less absorbed in what we lack and more aware of what we receive.

If prayer is part of your spiritual practice, take a moment to offer a sincere prayer or blessing for the well-being of these people.

You might say:

“May the farmers who provide our food remain safe and healthy. May the doctors and nurses who care for us receive strength and support. May the workers who keep our communities functioning be treated with dignity. May families facing difficulties find help. May people everywhere experience greater peace, health, and opportunity.”

You can also express gratitude in a nonreligious way by silently wishing others well.

Remember, prayer is not a transaction in which we expect happiness to be automatically returned to us. It is an expression of compassion, humility, gratitude, and hope.

When you recognize the value of other people's efforts, you begin to appreciate how deeply connected human lives are.

After reflecting on gratitude, gently bring your attention back to your breathing.

Allow the appreciation you feel to accompany you into your meditation.

4. TEN PRACTICAL STEPS FOR A MORE MEANINGFUL MEDITATION PRACTICE

Now that we have explored the three foundations, let us turn them into a simple routine.

Step 1: Choose a Quiet Place

Select a place where you can sit comfortably with minimal interruptions.

You do not need an expensive meditation room. A clean corner of your home is enough.

Step 2: Set a Realistic Intention

Before beginning, ask yourself:

“Why am I meditating today?”

Your intention might be to develop greater awareness, practice patience, reduce stress, or become more attentive to the present moment.

Avoid demanding a particular emotional result from every session.

Step 3: Reflect on Forgiveness

Spend two or three minutes acknowledging any unresolved guilt or resentment.

If you have harmed someone, identify a responsible next step. If someone has hurt you, consider what boundaries or emotional support you may need.

Do not force yourself to forgive before you are ready.

Step 4: Practice Self-Compassion

Acknowledge your imperfections without condemning yourself.

Remind yourself that personal growth involves learning, making mistakes, and changing your behavior.

Step 5: Express Gratitude

Bring to mind three people or things you genuinely appreciate.

They might include a family member, a teacher, a friend, a healthcare worker, or someone whose work supports your daily life.

Step 6: Sit Comfortably and Relax

Keep your back comfortably upright and your shoulders relaxed.

Rest your hands naturally. Close your eyes if that feels comfortable, or keep them gently open.

There is no need to force your body into an uncomfortable position.

Step 7: Focus on Your Breathing

Notice the natural rhythm of your breath.

Feel the air entering and leaving your body.

Do not force yourself to breathe deeply or hold your breath. Simply observe the breathing that is already happening.

Step 8: Allow Thoughts to Come and Go

Your mind will probably wander.

You may remember an unfinished task, a conversation, or a future responsibility.

This is normal.

When you notice that your attention has wandered, gently return it to your breathing.

You do not need to criticize yourself. Recognizing that your mind has wandered is itself part of the practice.

Step 9: Use a Mantra if It Helps You

If you enjoy chanting, you may quietly repeat Om or another meaningful mantra.

You can also use a simple phrase such as:

“I am here.”

“I am breathing.”

“May I respond with wisdom and compassion.”

Choose a method that suits your beliefs and preferences. Chanting is one option, not a compulsory requirement.

Step 10: End With a Clear Intention

When your session ends, take a few moments before returning to your activities.

Ask yourself:

“What is one quality I want to practice today?”

Perhaps patience, kindness, courage, honesty, or gratitude.

Choose one practical action that expresses that quality.

For example, if you choose kindness, listen patiently to someone instead of interrupting them.

This helps connect your meditation practice with your everyday life.

5. A REAL-LIFE EXAMPLE: FROM EMOTIONAL BURDEN TO GREATER AWARENESS

Consider the example of Amit, a working professional who often feels mentally exhausted.

He wakes up early and tries to meditate for fifteen minutes, but his mind repeatedly returns to a disagreement with a friend.

He remembers the friend's words, becomes angry again, and spends the entire session thinking about what happened.

After several unsuccessful attempts, Amit begins to believe that meditation is not for him.

Then he changes his approach.

Before his next session, he spends a few minutes writing about the disagreement. He acknowledges that he felt hurt and identifies what he needs to communicate to his friend.

He also recognizes that he spoke harshly during the argument and decides to apologize for his own behavior.

Next, he reminds himself that he does not have to resolve the entire relationship immediately. He can take responsibility for his actions while allowing the other person to make their own choices.

He then writes down three things he appreciates: his family's support, his health, and the opportunity to learn from difficult experiences.

Finally, he sits quietly and focuses on his natural breathing for five minutes.

His thoughts still wander, but he no longer treats every wandering thought as a failure. Whenever he notices his attention drifting, he gently returns to his breath.

Over the following weeks, Amit continues practicing and learns to approach difficult emotions with greater awareness.

This example does not suggest that forgiveness or meditation will automatically solve every problem. Instead, it illustrates how reflection, gratitude, and consistent practice can support a more constructive response to emotional challenges.

The key lesson is simple:

You do not need to make your mind perfectly silent. You can learn to meet your thoughts with greater awareness and return to the present moment, one breath at a time.

6. COMMON MISTAKES THAT CAN MAKE MEDITATION FRUSTRATING

Mistake 1: Expecting Immediate Results

Some people expect complete peace, confidence, and happiness after one meditation session.

Meditation is a practice, and individual experiences vary. Give yourself time to explore what works for you.

Mistake 2: Believing That Chanting Alone Guarantees Transformation

Chanting can be meaningful and calming for many people, but repeating a word does not automatically resolve every emotional difficulty.

The value of a practice depends partly on how you engage with it and whether it supports your broader well-being.

Mistake 3: Trying to Stop Every Thought

The appearance of thoughts does not mean you are meditating incorrectly.

Notice them and gently return to your chosen focus.

Mistake 4: Forcing Yourself to Forgive

Forgiveness is not a requirement you must complete before you are allowed to meditate.

If you are processing serious hurt or trauma, take your time and seek appropriate support if needed.

Mistake 5: Confusing Forgiveness With Reconciliation

You can work toward releasing resentment without restoring a relationship.

Protecting yourself from continued harm is compatible with compassion and inner peace.

Mistake 6: Blaming Yourself for Difficult Emotions

Anger, sadness, jealousy, and anxiety are human experiences.

Rather than treating them as evidence of personal failure, try to understand what triggers them and choose a constructive response.

Mistake 7: Making the Routine Too Complicated

You do not need to complete a long ritual before every meditation session.

Start with a manageable practice. Even five minutes of mindful breathing can be a useful beginning.

Mistake 8: Expecting Meditation to Solve Every Problem

Meditation may support awareness and emotional regulation, but it does not replace practical problem-solving, medical care, professional mental health support, or necessary changes in your circumstances.

Use meditation as one part of a balanced approach to well-being.

7. THE SEVEN-DAY MEDITATION ACTION PLAN

Use the following plan to begin developing a simple and consistent routine.

Day 1 — Awareness

Sit quietly for five minutes and observe your breathing. Notice your thoughts without trying to eliminate them.

Day 2 — Forgiveness Reflection

Write about one unresolved conflict. Identify what is within your control and whether an apology, boundary, or other constructive step is appropriate.

Day 3 — Self-Forgiveness

Reflect on one past mistake. Write down what you learned and what you would do differently today.

Day 4 — Gratitude

Identify five people whose work or care has positively influenced your life. Silently wish them well or express your appreciation to someone directly.

Day 5 — Mindful Breathing

Meditate for five to ten minutes. Whenever your mind wanders, gently return your attention to your breath.

Day 6 — Compassion

Spend a few moments wishing well for yourself and others.

You may silently repeat: “May I be safe. May I be healthy. May I act with wisdom. May others also experience safety and well-being.”

Day 7 — Review and Reflect

Ask yourself:

Was I able to practice consistently?

What thoughts distracted me most often?

Which practice felt most meaningful?

Did I notice any change in my awareness or response to emotions?

What routine can I realistically continue next week?

Do not judge the week only by whether you felt peaceful. Your willingness to practice and learn is also valuable.

After seven days, continue with a routine that feels sustainable. You can gradually increase your meditation time if it is comfortable and helpful.

8. CONCLUSION: PREPARE YOUR HEART, SETTLE YOUR ATTENTION, AND LIVE WITH AWARENESS

My dear friends, meditation is not a race toward perfection. It is an opportunity to understand yourself more deeply and develop a more conscious relationship with your thoughts, emotions, and actions.

Forgiveness can help us examine resentment and take responsibility for our mistakes.

Self-compassion can help us acknowledge our imperfections without allowing shame to define us

Gratitude and prayer can remind us of the people, efforts, and relationships that enrich our lives.

Mindful breathing can help us return our attention to the present moment whenever our minds wander.

But remember, you do not have to become emotionally perfect before you begin meditating. You do not have to forgive every person immediately, eliminate every difficult thought, or feel positive throughout the day.

You can begin exactly where you are.

Some days, meditation may feel peaceful. On other days, your mind may feel restless. Both experiences can be approached with patience and curiosity.

The real practice is not about controlling every thought. It is about learning how to respond to your experience with greater awareness.

As you develop this habit, try to carry its lessons into your relationships, your work, and your everyday decisions.

Listen more carefully. Speak more thoughtfully. Appreciate the efforts of others. Take responsibility for your actions. And give yourself permission to learn.

Your meditation practice does not end when you open your eyes. It continues in the way you treat yourself, the way you respond to others, and the choices you make throughout the day.

I am Surya Bhan, Motivational Speaker, Law of Attraction Coach, NLP Trainer, Ho'oponopono Healing Trainer, and Writer.

My message to you is this:

“Do not meditate merely to escape the noise of the world. Learn to meet yourself with awareness, compassion, and courage, so that you can return to the world and live more consciously.”

Thank you.

Breathe gently. Stay aware. Practice gratitude. Keep growing.

And remember: every new moment gives you another opportunity to begin.

— Surya Bhan